Loading game... please wait - it's worth it!

• It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
  
• Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience
  
• I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier!!!
  
• Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.
  
• I'm not a snob. I'm just better than you are.
  
• I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
  
• If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In The Kitchen
  
• I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.
  
• The more I know about women....the more I like my truck
  
• Properly trained.......man can be dogs best friend.
  
• If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you.
  
• You can't be first, but you could be next
  
• If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.
  
• I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.
  
• Lord, help me to be the person my dog thinks I am.
  
• My karma ran over your dogma!
  
• Life without danger is a waste of oxygen
  
• Recent studies have shown that people have been studying recently
  
• If you don't think every day is a good day, just try missing one.
  
• My wife ran away with my best friend. I sure miss him.
  
• Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
  
• The older I get, the better I was.
  
• Never try to teach a pig to sing, You waste your time and only annoys the pig.
  
• Coffee, Chocolate, Men. . . Some Things Are Just Better Rich.
• Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
• In my next life I'm going to have more memory installed
• My kid beat up your honor student.
• Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.
  
• Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.